Monday, 23 April 2018

Short People


I was always the shortest one in my class at school. The ultimate insult came in Form 3 at High School back in 1965 on annual classroom photo day. Lining us up from tallest to shortest so we could be arranged in evenly sized rows with the tallest in the middle, and the gradual slope down both sides, the photographer in his misplaced wisdom sat me on the ground with the board displaying Dandenong High School’s Form 3B. Doing such a thing in Grade 3 might have been acceptable, but Form 3? I was fourteen years old for goodness sake, which explains the only school photo I have which sports not the usual compliant smile but a look of absolute disdain.

My shortness was never a drawback as far as I was concerned. I was good at athletics, my stature gave me less wind resistance I reckoned, and even now I have no qualms about borrowing tall people in the supermarket to get things from the top shelf which I can only reach if I climb on the bottom shelf, which is somewhat frowned upon and an obvious workplace health and safety hazard.

I embraced Randy Newman’s song Short People with pride, I saved money by shopping in the kids department in my slimmer days, and even enjoyed a friend’s affectionate description of me as being vertically challenged. I don’t take up much space, and am perfectly happy to continue to do so.


Just like me
good things come in small
packages


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